Wise Guide to
by W. Blake Gray
Better sex is really easy. You could start having better sex tonight. All you have to do is want it — and convince your partner to want it too.
But that's the tricky part. Most Americans are too inhibited to talk about sex openly, even with our partners.
I have to admit that I was. Before being asked to write the Wise Guide to Better Sex, I could make jokes about sex, and I could use naughty words.
But I was easily shocked by women who knew exactly what they wanted. I also felt threatened by sex toys, and I was once so embarrassed by a girlfriend who wanted to go shopping for vibrators with me that I broke up with her.
Let me pause for a moment with a warning: this Wise Guide does not mince words. If you're easily offended by graphic descriptions of sexual situations and techniques, please don't read any further; this guide is probably not for you.
Instead, it's for people who already have a partner (or two) and are interested in improving their sex life. Besides my layman's observations, the guide includes advice from Dr. Marty Klein, a myprimetime.com columnist and licensed counselor.
Good sex is more than physical. If you can laugh with your partner during the act (try humming a TV show theme song while performing oral sex), then you can do anything else you want.
First, start by getting your partner interested.
"If you like an article on sex, print the thing out," said Dr. Bernie Zilbergeld, an Oakland, Calif., sex therapist and author of The New Male Sexuality. "I would give it to my partner and say, 'I found this very interesting. I'd love for you to read it and give me your opinion.' Whatever the adventuresome thing is, say why that's important. Make it as positive as possible."